I prefer to keep things neutral and positive on my blog but the trouble is that life isn’t always so. Within the past week I couldn’t help but overhear conversations that people were having about other people. One morning I was on the subway and heard two TTC employees talking about a colleague who was being referred to as a cancer. Then the other day I walked by a woman on her cell phone who had been venting about feeling drained by the company she had earlier.
Naturally, this got me thinking about people and how we affect each other.
By some force, perhaps gravity, all of humanity has been subjected to life on Earth. We never had a choice in the matter but are still required to make do with the circumstances. There are parts that have been established in advance, such as our genetic code or the family we are born into. While there are areas which we have been granted free reign over like the company we keep or the actions we choose to take. In a perfect world everyone would get along but that’s just not in the cards. The world will never know lasting peace because we have a difficult time maintaining it in our homes and within ourselves.
We are all carriers of baggage but some people expect you to carry their load too. Sometimes they can be easy to detect while others require an investment of time and energy. It cuts like a knife when you put forth an honest effort to be there for someone who simply doesn’t care. Either way you slice it, the only solution available is to completely disconnect from the source of your heartbreak. Undoubtedly, the closer you are with this person the greater the emotional complexities.
When a near and dear one repeatedly hurts you it can feel like pure torture. You start to question yourself and can’t seem to make any sense of what is happening. You don’t want to turn your back and give up but you know that if you don’t you will perish. Each time hope fades only to reveal utter disappointment and despair. You even find yourself making excuses for their behaviour so that you can temporarily feel at ease with the discomfort. All the while, you are slowly killing your spirit to accommodate someone who has zero interest in your well-being.
That doesn’t sound healthy at all.
It’s not unusual to find these people already on a collision course to self-destruction. They sweep through like a tornado attempting to destroy everything in sight. They knowingly and repeatedly make bad choices without taking into consideration how they may be affecting others. I strongly believe that this behavior stems from inner turmoil which is only being reflected back into the world. There is a lot of trauma brewing beneath the surface which manifests itself into widespread negativity.
Nobody has a right to bring you down in life but that doesn’t mean that some still won’t try. That’s why the more love you have for yourself the less likely you are to accept poor treatment. There are boundaries to everything in life and it’s very healthy to acknowledge and establish them. Periodically, we all need to take a personal inventory of our stock to ensure that we are of sound mind, body and spirit. Unfortunately nobody is going to do this for you so you owe it to yourself.
There are plenty of lessons to learn at The School of Hard Knocks where class is always in session and the tests never stop.